Gotcha
by Liquid Laughter
Summary: As a war brews and Lily completes her final year at Hogwarts, she starts noticing differences in herself and...certain other people who shall, for the sake of her sanity, remain nameless. A story of friendship, love, and holding on to what you've got.
1. Of Sneaking and Sleep Deprivation

_Disclaimer: There are many things that I am not. The fantastically brilliant creator of Harry Potter and all things connected with him is one of them. _

_Sneaky, sneaky, I'm being sneaky…oh so sneaky…_ I sang in my head as I snuck into Gryffindor tower. _I am sneakier than the sneakiest sneaky-bean in the whole history of sneakdom…_ I continued with aforementioned "sneakage," moving through the common room more stealthily than I would have thought possible for me. _I'm just glad I'm alone and the lot of bloody nutters went to bed. Bleeding mad, the lot of them. Would have made a great story, though, I'm sure: "Head Girl caught sneaking in Common Room three and a half hours after curfew three days into term." Now there's a great way to start off your year_. I was just about to sneak up the stairway leading to the seventh year girls' dormitories, when my ears suddenly caught the barest hint of a sigh. My foot hesitated on the bottom step.

Whoever was sighing sounded rather pathetic and down. I momentarily warred with myself: bed, meaning sleep, versus my conscience, who was telling me to go see what was wrong. I mentally sighed and cursed at my conscience before sneaking over to the sofa from which the sound had originated. Sitting with his back to me, leaning against the cushions and staring up at the ceiling with closed eyes was Mr. James Potter himself. The bloody prat hadn't even heard me open the portrait hole and sneak in. Yeah. That's right. I was that damn sneaky. I grinned and mentally patted myself on the back before focusing once again on the boy…man…thing…he was technically a man, right? Since he seventeen and all?....before me; he looked rather upset and very tired. I moved to stand directly behind him, so that if he opened his eyes he'd be looking straight into my face. Then I asked softly, "Are you okay?"

The effect was instantaneous and entertaining. Potter's eyes flew open, full of shock. He jumped up and tripped in his haste to get away from me, landing on the floor staring up at me with an open, shocked, confused expression. When he didn't speak, I turned around and fell backwards over the back of the sofa so that I was facing him, with my back on the seat cushions and my legs thrown over the top. "'Cause if you're not, you know, it always helps to get things out in the open and talk it over. Well, usually, anyways…" I trailed off, thinking of that one time with Evangeline and the flobberworms when it had not, in fact, helped at all… "But at least you'll feel better because someone else will know about whatever's bothering you and you'll no longer be wondering if you're mad for constantly arguing with yourself about it." He continued to blink at me in a shocked manner. You know, when he wasn't talking, and he wasn't surrounded by his loud and prank-playing mates, and he wasn't wearing an arrogant, cocky smirk, and I was looking at him upside down, and my vision was nearly blurry with exhaustion, I could almost see why half the female population at Hogwarts went on about him being the most gorgeous creature to walk these halls. Though most of the time he strutted, as opposed to walking. But still.

He finally broke out of his trance, choking out an, "E-Evans?" I grinned cheekily and gave him a little finger wave. "Wh- What are you doing?" he asked cautiously, as though expecting me to attack him. I internally huffed. Honestly, people. I was not that bad. When my answer was civil and did not involve pulling out my wand and hexing him senseless, he appeared to visibly relax. I internally huffed again.

"I'm lying upside down on a sofa talking – well, sort of – to you, Potter. Duh." He blinked owlishly at me.

"_Why_?" I rolled my eyes.

"Well, odd as it sounds, I've found I always think better with all the blood rushing to my head. It's strangely relaxing. Also, you looked upset."

"…So?"

"So what?"

"So why are you here, talking to me?" I shrugged, which, coincidentally, is a rather difficult feat to accomplish whilst one is lying upside down on a sofa.

"You looked like you needed someone to talk to."

"Okay, who the bloody hell are you and what the bloody hell have you done with Lily Evans?!" he cried accusingly, jumping to his feet.

"Just so you know, I completely resent the implication that I am incapable of compassionate thought and or actions," I grumbled, glaring at him, though I'm sure the effect was somewhat marred due to my being upside down, and only about 5'5".

"I ask again, _Who are you?!"_ I internally huffed yet again.

"I _am_ Lily, Potter!"

"Yeah?" he said doubtfully. "What's your favorite color?"

"Yellow," I replied, rolling my eyes.

"Favorite class?"

"Charms."

"Favorite food?"

"Raspberry tarts."

"Favorite flower?"

"Daffodil."

"Hmm," he said. "I'll have to keep that in mind."

"Prat!" I glared at him, reaching out to smack his knee.

"Aha!" he cried, smiling. "It _is_ you, Evans! I was so worried you were a Slytherin or a Ravenclaw in disguise." He settled himself onto the floor directly in front of me, leaning back on his hands. "So, really. Why _are_ you here talking to me?"

This time I didn't bother to keep my huff internal. "I _told_ you," I grumped. "But excuse me for listening to my stupid conscience instead of going up to my nice, comfy bed like I wanted to." I started to get up, but Potter sat up straight, suddenly a lot closer than I expected, and I froze.

"Wait, you were serious?" he said softly, his eyes wide and surprised behind his glasses. I rolled my own eyes.

"No, actually, Potter, I'm just playing mind games with you in the hopes that you'll go stark raving mad and provide sufficient entertainment throughout the year to take my mind off NEWTS."

"I'd like to think I do that anyway," he grinned. His eyes twinkled, then grew softer. "Thank you," he said.

"For what?"

"For caring.'

"Yes, well," I blushed. "You _are_ Head Boy. I've got to keep you healthy and happy so the prefects are appeased with their sacrifice." He laughed.

"Head Girl planning on surviving the year, then?"

"Damn straight she is," I sniffed, earning a laugh. His eyes twinkled, taking on their mischief-making glow. I decided it was my sleep-deprived mind talking when a little voice in my head said he had very pretty eyes.

"Speaking of the Head Girl, might one ask what she was doing out of the tower nearly…four hours past curfew?" he asked, glancing down at his watch.

"One might," I replied flippantly. "But one should not expect an answer to one's question but rather prepare to be promptly told to bugger off." At that he laughed loudly.

"And why would the Head Girl do such an atrocious, heartless thing?"

"Because the Head Girl enjoys the shock on the Head Boy's face when someone thwarts his attempts to be all-knowing."

"The Head Boy gets it: the Head Girl is merely going to use him to protect herself from the vicious prefects, and not tell him anything, and then mock him, too."

"The Head Girl is glad he understands." I closed my eyes. I opened them moments later when Potter spoke.

"Head Girl _does_ realize she's been referring to herself in third person for the last five minutes, right?"

"Head Girl would like to point out that Head Boy started it." He shook his head and chuckled, looking away to the now-dying embers in the fireplace before snapping his head back to me, his eyes wide with shock.

"Holy shite, Evans! We just had an entirely civil conversation that consisted of more than, 'Can you please pass the marmalade?' 'Certainly.'" I squirmed uncomfortably.

"Yeah, about that…" His eyes narrowed.

"Wait; _was_ it all a mind trick?"

"No," I rolled my eyes. "You're surprisingly easy to be around when you're not being an arse."

"Good to know," he snorted. "Then what…?"

I sighed. My stupid conscience was pricking me again. "You never actually told me what was wrong." He grinned, shaking his head.

"Thanks, but don't worry about it. I'm feeling much better now."

"Glad I could help." I yawned. He snickered.

"Maybe you should get to bed. You look pretty knackered."

"Right-o," I agreed, rolling backwards until my feet made semi-graceful contact with the floor.

"Night."

"Night, Evans," he chuckled. I paused at the foot of the staircase.

"Oh, and Potter?"

"Yeah?" he asked, amused.

"I'm sorry I've been such a stick-up-her-arse bitch for the last six or so years." I saw his eyes widen with surprise before I smiled at him and turned to walk up the staircase and into my soft, warm bed.


	2. Toby the Toaster Hates Change

_Disclaimer:_ _Do I own it? No. Excuse me as I go to cry in a corner over the heartbreaking reality of my situation. . _

"It's too bloody fucking early," Evangeline groaned, dropping her head to the table where it came dangerously close to landing in her eggs. I snickered, quickly flicking my wand and removing the fluffy yellow concoctions from my friend's immediate vicinity before they could end up all over her pretty, pouting…make that grumbling, glaring…face. Evidently someone was still not a morning person, despite her fervent promise to spend each morning of summer holidays saluting the sun in its early-morning "rise".

Just as I was charming the pumpkin juice out of her way, I felt two bodies settling in on either side of me.

"Well, well, well," said a voice on my left. "You're looking bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this morning, Jeanette." Evangeline raised her head long enough to glare darkly at him.

"Fuck. You. Black," she spat before thunking her head back on the table The boy on my left turned to me with a grin.

"Well Evans, aren't you going to tell her off for the use of such foul and atrocious language, at the _breakfast table_, no less?" I shrugged, flipping through _The Daily Prophet_.

"Nah."

"Nah?!!" I looked up at his shocked cry. His jaw had dropped and his eyes were bugging out, much like Potter's had been last night. I vaguely wondered if the fact that everyone was staring at me like that was any indication of my behavior in the past as I watched Sirius try to wrap his mind around the idea. Apparently he gave up, because he spluttered, "Why 'Nah'?!" I shrugged again.

"Aren't you the one who told me I needed to loosen up and remove the and I quote 'stick rammed up my arse'?" I flipped another page of my paper, not looking up. "Besides, I like Ev better than I like you."

He gasped, the cried loudly enough for the entire Great Hall to hear, "You wound me deeply, Lily Evans!" Most of the movement and noise momentarily stopped as everyone looked over to see Sirius clutching his heart dramatically.

As everyone went back to their own business, I remarked, "Just a suggestion, Black: don't become an actor or an assassin. Neither theater nor subtlety is your strong suit." I closed my paper and looked up at him for the first time.

He gaped at me openly, his arms hanging limply by his sides. "You mean I can't even get a rise out of you by screaming your name across the hall and disrupting the peace?" I raised my eyebrow.

"Apparently not."

"Okay," he cried, jumping to his feet and pointing at me accusingly. "Who the bloody hell are you and what the bloody hell have you done with Lily Evans?!!"

"Why does everyone keep reacting like that?" I asked Evangeline. She shrugged, her head still down on the table. I glanced up to see most of the Hall staring at us again. "Don't mind him, people," I called, gesturing to Sirius again. "He just forgot to take his meds this morning." I heard a few laughs as everyone turned away, and the boy on my right snorted. I turned to him, smiling brightly when I saw who it was. "Remus!" Out of all Potter and Black's mates, Remus Lupin was my official and undisputed favorite. He smiled at me.

"How are you, Lily?"

"Fine…ish," I answered, waving the whole issue away with my hand. "I'm just glad to be back. How are you? Have a good holiday?"

"I did, thanks," he grinned. "Congrats on making Head Girl."

"Thanks." I attempted a smile, but I think it came out more like a grimace, because he frowned at me concernedly.

"Are you – " he started, but he was cut off as Sirius literally pulled me forcefully, albeit gently, out of my seat.

"What – " I spluttered, but he began prodding and poking me and turning me around so he could inspect from all angles.

"You _look_ like Lily Evans," he muttered. "You _sound_ like Lily Evans." He leaned in to sniff my hair. I pulled a face. "You even _**smell**_ like Lily Evans." He pulled back, looking puzzled.

"Here's a guess, mate," Remus snickered. "Maybe she _is_ Lily Evans."

"Nah, too easy," Sirius said, waving away Remus' suggestion as though it were a pesky fly. He studied me closely. "Man, and I thought Prongs was kidding," he muttered. "This is just too much change for me," he said throwing himself down into his seat and placing his head on the table with a dramatic sigh.

"I'm sure you'll get over it eventually," I said dryly, patting his back as I resettled on the bench. His shoulder twitched. Across from me, Evangeline sat up, stretching and yawning.

"We've got to get to Runes, Lil," she said.

"Right-o," I agreed as I stood to gather my stuff. "Have a nice day Remus, Sirius," I smiled.

Remus grinned back, a look of extreme amusement in his eyes as Sirius threw back his head and howled, "Stop rubbing in the change, woman!"

The day continued rather normally, or at least as normally as days at Hogwarts _can_ continue. After Runes, Evangeline and I had Arithmancy, and then we parted ways as I journeyed to Transfiguration and she to Muggle Studies (when I asked her why she had taken the course, she stared at me like I was mental and said, "To gain a fascinating new perspective on a different lifestyle, Lil. Duh." To which I pointed out, "Uh, Ev? I'm a Muggle-born. You've come over to my house almost every holiday since we were twelve. You probably know more about Muggles than the professor." To which she merely sniffed and muttered something about it "not being the same". Turns out the real reason she took the class sits right in front of her, is supposedly quite easy on the eyes, and is rumored to be an "exceptional snogger".)

Anyway, I sort of trudged my way to Transfiguration. It wasn't my least-favorite class, and I was fair enough at it, but…alright, let's be honest, people: it wasn't Charms. A few moments after settling myself in my seat and smiling at Professor McGonagall (receiving a head-nod in return, _thank_ you very much! I took it as a sign of good things to come), a very distinct someone settled himself on my right.

"All right, Evans?" Potter asked cautiously as he sat down, regarding me as one would a bomb about to go off. I grinned wickedly at the thought, and he cringed a little.

"Fair enough, I s'pose, Potter. How're you?" When he saw that my determination to be civil or even friendly was not a side-effect of my sheer exhaustion last night (though perhaps he had good reason to be nervous, what with how mad I'd been acting. Could I blame _that_ on the exhaustion, or was I always like that? Hm. I'd have to ask Ev. But I digress), he relaxed and grinned.

"I'll have you know, Evans, I am bloody fantastic." He leaned back in his chair, his hands behind his head, the poster boy for contentment. "I slept in this morning, was able to scrape up a good enough Rationality Drought for Slughorn to find passable, in spite of the fact that it made Dennis Smith incredibly twitchy, _and_ we have lunch next. Bloody _fantastic_." He smiled lazily. "Still can't believe I got away with that potion," he commented lightly.

I snorted in disbelief; James Potter was many things, but modest was not one of them. Aloud, I merely said, "Rational thought never has been your strong suit, has it?" He laughed appreciatively at that, and I smiled innocently at him, making him laugh harder.

He was still laughing an hour later as we made our way to the Great Hall for lunch. I stomped along, desperately trying to ignore the person following me. Every time he started to talk, I'd glare at him, sending into another fit of laughter again. Barking mad, the bloody bugger. I marched up to the Gryffindor table and slammed my bag down loudly. Evangeline looked up from where she was chatting with Remus, Sirius, and Peter, one of Potter's other friends, and smirked.

"Hello to you, too, Sunshine." I glared at her, then at the bloody buggering prat in the seat next to me, and he burst, yet again, into chuckles of mirth. When he refused to cease and desist, I grabbed an apple off Ev's plate and bit into it rather viciously to keep myself from saying something nasty. I then proceeded to angle my body away from Mr. Happy-Pants and broodingly took another bite of my…well, Evangeline's…but mine now!...apple.

"Merlin, James," Remus sighed. "What'd you do to Lily? She was in such a good mood this morning."

"Right bloody annoying it was, too," Evangeline grumbled, stabbing some pasta with a fork. Sirius nodded emphatically at her side, throwing me a glare for good measure. I considered flicking him off, but decided he wasn't worth the effort and instead bit into my apple with a satisfying crunch. James Bloody _Potter_ finally quit with the giggles and ruffled my hair condescendingly. I tried to bite his hand.

"Evans here," he smirked, "transfigured Toby McMannon into a toaster." Evangeline gasped as Sirius broke into uproarious laughter and Peter snickered. Remus, bless his sweet considerate little heart, was trying valiantly to hold in his amusement.

"What the ruddy sod _forgot_ to tell you," I glared at Potter, who blinked at me and smiled complacently, "was that right as I said the incantation to turn the _tabby cat_," I glared again, "into a toaster, _Twinkle-Toes Potter_ "tripped" into me, knocking my want straight towards Toby."

"It's alright, Evans," he smirked back at me. "You made a perfectly honest mistake. Could've happened to anyone." Evangeline, probably noticing the way my eye was twitching and my fingers were stealthily sneaking towards my wand, decided to save me from myself.

"What do you have next, Lil?"

"Potions," I ground out. Sirius groaned. Remus smiled. Potter snickered. Peter rolled his eyes, and Evangeline's widened. I decided right then and there that McGonagall's head-nod was not a premonition of good luck. It was probably more of a nod of utmost sympathy.

After Potions, during which Remus and Sirius blockaded me between the two of them (as they had during breakfast) and insisted we were all going to be very cheerful and happy Potions Partners, I went to my last class of the day, Defense Against the Dark Arts. In a far more serious mood than I'd entered, I walked out of the door at the end of the hour; however, I stopped short when I saw what was waiting for me. Sirius Black was down on one knee, kneeling next to a question he'd magicked into the air. I turned; however, before I could regain the safety of the classroom, he caught my arm.

"Evans," he said in a faux-besotted voice. Remus suddenly ran up the corridor, hissing at him to stop. I loved that boy. I really did. Lovely chap, that Remus. At least, I thought so until he got down on one knee beside Sirius, grabbing my other hand. I immediately revoked my prior opinion.

"I told you to wait for me, you ruddy prick!" Sirius shrugged, sniggering, and both turned back to me.

"Evans – "

"Lily – "

I begged the passing crowds with my eyes, but they merely gathered to watching, laughing. Bastards.

" – Will you be our Potions Partner?"

I wanted to die. No, actually, I wanted _them_ to die. And _then_ I wanted to die. Although I opened my mouth to give them a polite yet emphatic "No", or a resoundingly emphatic "No", or perhaps even a "Go throw yourselves in the lake, you bloody wankers," I was cut off as Sirius jumped to his feet.

"Lovely. Brilliant. So glad you accepted." Remus pretended to wipe a tear of joy from his eye. And then the two of them proceeded to literally march me…yes, with goose-stepping and everything…me to the Great Hall for dinner. They marched me all the way over to our seats and sat me down between the two of them, across from Potter and Peter, who smirked at each other and burst into laughter.

"Bastards," I muttered. "Bloody bastards, the lot of you." This only made them laugh harder, but luckily for me and my new-found determination to be nice, my best friend waltzed in at that moment, plopping into the seat between Potter and Peter.

"Brilliant," she sighed dreamily. "Bloody brilliant." She grinned at me. "You'll never guess who's in Care of Magical Creatures with me." I grinned back, already knowing from the devious smile upon her face.

"The eye candy from Muggle Studies?"

"The eye candy from Muggle Studies," still grinning lazily. "He's just so positively…mmm. Yum." I snickered, Remus' eyebrows flew up, Peter and Potter grimaced, and Sirius pretended to dry-heave. When he recovered, he put his arm around my shoulders. I tried to shrug it off, but the lug was nearly twice my size.

"Well," he remarked. "I have big news, as well. I popped Evans the question, and she accepted." Remus coughed. "And Remus, too." Evangeline's forehead wrinkled.

"You asked Lily and Remus to marry you, and Lily said yes?! Lily Evans? _My_ Lily?!" Peter and the moron sitting next to him broke out laughing again, and Sirius and Remus both wrinkled their faces in disgust.

"_No_," Sirius said forcefully. "No; Remus and I have asked Evans to be our Potions Partner, and she most happily accepted."

"I did nothing of the sort, you prat – "

"Come now, Evans," he sighed. "There's no need to deny our love – "

"Sirius." I cut him off in a dangerously sweet voice. "I think you should shut up now." He, of course, being himself, ignored me.

"Evans," he heaved a sigh. "I love you and all that shite, but I told you earlier, the first name thing really creeps me out. I'm still not used to you being nic– " His voice was suddenly cut off, though his mouth continued to move. Potter gasped, then laughed with delight. Sirius seemed to realize something was up, and he clutched his throat and pointed his finger at me accusingly. I believe he said…er, mouthed…"You! You did this to me!" But then again, it could easily have been, "Oy! I really have to pee!"

Evangeline smirked at me as the three vocal boys next to us roared with laughter and slapped their hands on the table, taunting their mate and prompting him to throw silent obscenities at them, which, of course, only made them laugh harder. "Nice to know someone's been practicing that non-verbal magic over the summer." I smiled happily, hugging myself, my snit quite forgotten.

"I _love_ being seventeen," I sang at her. She snorted, but nodded.

"How was the party, anyways? Sorry I couldn't make it." She shot me an apologetic look as she buttered her roll. I waved her apology aside, ignoring the now-silent-and-gasping-for-breath boys around us.

"It's fine. It wasn't that exciting, anyways. In the Muggle world, I'm not an adult for another year, so it wasn't a big deal. We had the whole family there for dinner, though, so that was kind of nice."

Ev shot me a look. "The _whole_ family, hmm?"

"Well, you weren't there," I dodged. "And neither was Uncle Davy."

"And what about darling "Tuney", hmm? She viciously bit into her roll. I looked down, poking at my chicken with my fork, pretending I couldn't hear her. Out of the corners of my eyes, I saw all four guys eyeing me curiously. "How is dear old Horse-Face, anyway?" she asked, ignoring my reaction. I sighed, looking up at her.

"Stop that. She's my sister." She huffed.

"Fine. How is _Petunia_," she spat the name, "since I've been deprived the pleasure of her company for so long?" I shrugged, avoiding eye contact.

"She's married," I said softly.

"_What_?!"

"Evangeline!"

"_**Who**_would marry _**her**_?!"

"_Evangeline_!"

"Oh, come on," she groaned. "You know you've thought it, too." I stared at her. "Fine. What's his name?"

"Vernon Dursley, apparently."

"'Vernon'?" she snorted in derision. Then her eyes narrowed. I cringed. Whoops. "What do you mean, 'apparently'?" I shrugged, toying with my chicken again. Her eyes narrowed further. I wasn't looking, but I could tell. She was practically burning me alive with the force of her glare. "How was the wedding, Lily?" Silence. "How was the wedding, Lily Eileen Evans?" I looked up, barely able to grant her a weak smile. My voice was very quiet, but firm, thank Merlin.

"Mum said it was lovely." Potter and Sirius exchanged a glance as I pushed back my nearly untouched plate. "I'm finished. I'll see you later."

"Lily –" she started.

"I'm fine."

"You haven't even eaten – "

"Not hungry, honest." I shot her a slight smile and picked up my bag, "See you around, guys. 'Night, Sirius."

"'Night, Evans," he gasped, clearly relieved to have his voice back. I strode from the hall as quickly as I could, before I did something I would regret. Like cry.

**A/N: Suggestions? Comments? Critiques? **


	3. Illumination of the Loonies

_So it's been a long, long while…thanks for your patience! _

_Disclaimer: It is not mine. Oh, the shame. _

I think I was sitting on the hilly outcropping not too far from the Forest. Far below me was the lake. I vaguely recall that the sky was pouring rain, but I couldn't remember much of anything else. I was watching the scene play out on the grassy plateau below me. The little figures frolicked and laughed, and I smiled, momentarily lost in my personal bubble of dry warmth. Suddenly I heard footsteps running towards me at an extremely rapid pace, and a familiar voice shouting, "Evans. Hey, Evans. Lily! _Lily_!" I didn't turn around or even have time to recognize that he had called me "Lily" for the first time in, well, ever, because suddenly, a much more important voice was calling my name.

"Lily! Lily! Come on, Lily!" My gaze focused on her face, small and sweet. She giggled as she watched my tiny self tumble and trip along after her. I simultaneously heard James Potter come to a stop behind me, panting and watching the scene unfold. "Tuney, wait up!" my six year old self cried. "Come on, then, silly!" she laughed, and she ran back to grab my hand. We ran across the clearing, disappearing, as another image materialized.

"Tuney," I whined, a few years older. "Do I _have_ to come?" "Yes, Lily," she sighed, pulling my hand along. "_Why_?" "Because I want you there." My vision self stopped short, staring up at her idol with wide, hopeful eyes. "_Really_?" My sister rolled her eyes. "Of course." "But what about your friends?" "Don't worry, Lily," she comforted me, seeing through me as usual. "I won't leave you alone." And like the visions before them, the two figures tripped off to disappear suddenly.

"I don't want you to go," I cried. "I want you to stay. I'll miss you too much." "Lily," she sighed, bending down to hug me tightly. "It's just a trip. I'll be home in two weeks. Two weeks! That's nothing! And when I come back, we'll have the rest of the summer; that's a whole month before you start at school with me!" "Promise?" my eleven-year old self sniffled. I'd never been without my sister before. "Promise." She hugged me one last time, then skipped off by herself, while my little memory double sat and literally dissolved into tears.

Three weeks later, Petunia and I were swinging in the park near our house. "I don't know, Lily. It's a little…weird. Witchcraft and Wizardry?" "Please don't be angry, Tuney. I'm really, really sorry." She sighed, looking at her shadow. "I don't know, Lily." She hopped off the swing and walked away, leaving my little self behind.

Another month later, I was desperately trying to say goodbye to her, and she was having none of it. "Tuney, _please_," I begged, glancing, panic-stricken, at the clock that was inching closer and closer to eleven. "Please." She looked at me. The tears started to flow, and I threw my arms around her, desperately trying to salvage the bond we had lost in the last few weeks. After a moment, she hugged me back gently. "Bye, Lily." She was quiet, not at all the exuberant older sister I had known. "I love you, Tuney. I'll miss you." "Love you, too, Lily." I waved until the scarlet engine left her behind and she was too small to see.

Nearly a year later, I was arriving home. I ran into the house, eager to see my sister, and bumped into one of her friends. "God, Lily," Petunia snapped. "What's wrong with you?" Then she turned and walked away, arms linked with her friend, leaving me wondering what the hell was going on. After that, the images started to blur and fade into one another. The sneer she learned to address me with after second year. The snide comments and rude remarks after third. The further deterioration of our relationship throughout fourth and fifth year. The summer holiday before sixth year when we had gotten into a fight over something stupid and she screamed that she hated me. The images flickered and sped, unclear and translucent. Than everything faded and all I could see was my sister and I, standing about five feet away from each other, everything about our stances screaming, "CONFLICT!" as loudly as it possibly could. It was the beginning of the most recent summer, about three weeks before I turned seventeen. Petunia stepped forward, probably in response to something I had just said that wasn't included in the memory, and pushed me with all her might (which, incidentally, wasn't much. My beautiful sister had changed, the soft, kind contours of her face turning hard, bony, and angular), so that I stumbled back. "God, Lily. You're such a freak." She sneered and turned away, leaving me gaping up at her. Unlike the other images, it didn't fade, but looped itself, repeating over and over. "God, Lily. You're such a freak." "God, Lily. You're such a freak." "God, Lily. Such a freak." "God, Lily. Freak." "God, Lily." "God, Lily." "_God_, Lily."

Suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder. My eyes closed, and I heard the images instantly disappear. I clutched my arms tighter around my legs, willing my memory to shut off as easily as the charm which had projected the images had. I heard Potter move his hand from my shoulder and sit down beside me. It was quiet for a few minutes.

"You were a cute kid," he said quietly. I snorted rather indelicately. "S'true," he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Thanks," I muttered, opening my eyes to look up at him. "…You're all wet."

"Well, it _is_ raining," he pointed out obviously, as though talking to a patient in St. Mungos. I gestured to my bubble of warmth and dry air, and he scowled, shaking the water out of his hair.

"You always were bloody brilliant at Charms," he muttered. I half-smiled, lazily pointing my wand at him while I gazed back down at the clearing.

"Thanks," he said, moments later, dry and surrounded in his own bubble.

"Mm-hmm." It was quiet for a few minutes more, then…

"It just explains _so_ much." I quickly weighed my options, and decided that my chances of pretending absolutely nothing had happened and he had just happened to stumble upon me observing the giant squid frolicking cheerfully in the rain without him calling me on it were not all that great. So I went with a different tactic.

"What does it explain?"

"Well,you, of course," he said, clucking his tongue and turning to look at me. "The high and mighty, teacher's pet, perfectionist Lily Evans we've all come to know and love these last six or so years."

I snorted again. "The bitchy one with the stick up her arse?"

He chuckled. "I wouldn't go so far as to listen to Sirius' opinion of your behavior. You've given him too many detentions for him to be impartial when it comes to you." I sighed, mentally acknowledging the truth of it all, and decided that it would be much easier for me to continue making his life a living hell than to try and be nice to him. Besides, didn't he say the affability made him twitchy? "It was all because of her, wasn't it? Your sister. She's never really gotten over you being a witch, and you've been doing everything in your power for the last six years to be as perfect and normal as you can be, so you can win yourself into her good graces."

"Well, yeah, it's gonna sound pathetic when you phrase it like that," I muttered, burying my head in my arms. He chuckled.

"Well, I know you probably won't want to, because you're the most bloody stubborn person I know, but if you need to talk to anyone, I'd be happy to listen."

"Thanks, James," I sighed. He looked up sharply, throwing me a faux-wondering grin.

"Doth mine ears deceive me?" he gasped. "That's the first time you've used my first name in, well…ever, Lily."

"Could say the same about you." And then it was quiet, and we sat there in the pouring rain, smiling out at the lake like a bunch of loons.


	4. Sullen Sulking Leads to Masochism

_Oh, dear. It, er, has been awhile, hasn't it? Sorry._

_Disclaimer: It beith not mine!...eth._

******

The days passed relatively quickly as Hogwarts settled into the hectic and crazed routine of the first few weeks of a new year. The fifth years were rapidly becoming panicked over their already-overwhelming workload, the third years were lamenting and rejoicing their new courses, and the first years were attempting to discern who among the older students would answer their requests for directions honestly and who would merely direct them to Filch's favorite broom closet (my best friend was, regrettably, among the latter group).

Despite the truce that Evangeline and I seemed to have struck with the Marauders, we'd had no further contact with them (other than in classes and occasionally passing in the corridors) since the day James had followed me out to the lake. Evangeline, being Evangeline, seemed either not to notice or not to care that they had kept to themselves for the past week. I, despite my feigned disinterest, knew that their sudden reticence and desire not to draw attention to themselves grew in direct proportion to the rate at which Remus grew more gaunt and pale.

"Lily," Evangeline stated decisively as we sat down to lunch in the Great Hall one day. I grimaced at her tone as she proceeded to spoon tomato soup into her bowl. "I think we should go swimming tonight." I groaned.

"In the lake?" Out of the corner of my eye, I saw James Potter's head shoot up to stare at me from his seat a few spaces down from Evangeline. I did my best to ignore his suddenly apprehensive expression.

"Duh, Lil! Of course in the lake, just like always!" I shook my head, pushing my untouched plate of delicious-looking Shepherd's Pie. Internally I sighed; if she had chosen any other night…

…but she hadn't. "Lily!" she whined. "Why not? Is this just because you're Head Girl now?" Her face turned sullen. "You can't stop me!" In my peripheral vision, James' face grew panicked. "There is absolutely nothing you can do, short of dying, that will prevent me from my swimming trip!" James' apprehension quickly turned to horror.

I closed my eyes briefly, focusing intently on counting to ten and not bludgeoning my best friend upside the head with the nearby pitcher of pumpkin juice as she continued to sulk. Normally I loved her tenacity; however, in times like these, when I needed her cooperation, it was really quite trying. Despite her protests, there _was_ one way I could stop her, and tonight of all nights she had to be stopped. Regrettably, she was quite serious in her assertion that nothing short of my immediate danger could dissuade her.

I could feel the effects of the charm set in soon after I muttered the incantation, and I knew when my face went white. "No, it's not about the rules," I responded, late in replying to her whining. "I just…I don't feel well." I gasped, jumping up and nearly running out of the Great Hall, tripping up the marble staircase, bursting through the portrait hole, rushing through the common room and into the dormitory bathroom. Luckily, everyone was out at lunch. As I was emptying the contents of my stomach, I felt Evangeline open the door. She rushed to me, pulling my hair back from my face just as my stomach started in on the dry heaves.

When my trembling stomach finally stopped heaving, she wiped my clammy face off with a cool towel and pulled me gently to my feet.

"C'mon," she muttered, leading me down the staircase to the common room, now empty. She laid me down on a couch, and I immediately curled in towards the cushions, gripping to pillows tightly. "I'm going to Madame Pomfrey." At my noise of protest, she cut me off. "No, Lily. I'm going to Madame Pomfrey to see if she's found out anything that could help you since the last time it happened. Listen, people are going to be coming in a few hours or so, once classes are out, and you'll be able to ask someone if you need help, okay?" He voice softened at the end, and she bent down to smooth my hair out of my face and kiss my forehead. "I'll be back as soon as I can, okay?" At my rather pathetic nod, she bustled off, determined to save me, and I pulled a face as I heard her leave. I hated deceiving her and putting her through so much stress, but it could hardly be avoided. I tried to alleviate my guilty conscience by focusing on the pain in my stomach instead, which – stupid me – accomplished my goal of getting my mind off Evangeline, but only served to intensify the pain. I whimpered and clutched the pillows more tightly.

A few minutes later, I felt the familiar throbbing, ripping sensation set in, and knew from experience I should keep my face exposed to fresh, open air rather than musty cushions if I wanted to keep from dry heaving until I choked. I shut my eyes tightly as I rolled to curl up on my other side, the movement sending a sharp flash of pain through me, causing me to whimper again.

"Is she okay?" I heard Sirius whisper cautiously.

"You don't think she's dying, do you?" Peter asked nervously.

"Shut up, Pete," Sirius snapped, sounding suddenly anxious.

I slowly opened my eyes to see James Potter's face not three inches from my own. Dimly, through the pain, my mind registered that the sight was not an entirely unpleasant one to open one's eyes to. I immediately dismissed the thought as pain-induced delirium. He ignored the whispers of his friends, standing grouped behind him. "Lily?" he said softly. "Lily, are you alright?"

"I – " And my affirmation was cut off with a tremendous groan as my stomach throbbed violently, and my knees automatically drew up towards my face, causing me to curl more tightly into myself. I looked up a moment later to see all four boys' faces taught with worry. "I'm fine," I whispered, my arms clasped tightly around my legs. I'd found that if I kept myself in as immoveable a lockdown as was physically possible, the cramped position lessened the pain.

"I know you think we're all stupid, Evans," said Sirius tightly, "but there is no bloody way we're believing you." James ignored him.

"What'd you do?" he asked softly, pushing the slightly damp hair off my forehead.

"It's nothing to worry about," I whispered, my eyes screwing shut and my head tucking into my chest as another violent tremor rocked my body.

"Nothing to worry about?! Lily!" Remus cried as Sirius simultaneously shouted, "Dammit, Evans! You're lying in fetal position, cringing every time you breathe!"

James, the only non-nutter of the group, merely stroked my head and said softly, "You don't really expect me to believe that, do you?" The soft volume of his voice was heavenly after the less-than-dulcet tones of Sirius, Remus, and Evangeline. I considered re-evaluating the status of Remus as my undisputed favorite.

I shuddered again as the burning started. That was always the worst part: the burning. James must have noticed my pain, because he immediately said, "It's okay, Lily. Evangeline's seeing Madame Pomfrey right now; I saw her headed that way. So Madame Pomfrey will be up here any time to have you fixed up, good as new." I merely nodded, sagging heavily against the cushions, humoring his optimism, twisting my right arm behind me in an attempt to work out the knot in my shoulder. I felt someone settle on the sofa next to me, and strong, gentle hands began massaging my sore shoulder blade.

"Merlin, you're wonderful," I whispered, eyes closed again.

"Now I _know_ she's not alright," I heard Sirius mutter, sounding – if possible – more worried than before as he began pacing back and forth in front of my sofa.

After nearly fifteen minutes of heavenly relaxation, punctuated every thirty seconds or so by the convulsions the spasms in my stomach caused, the portrait hole burst open and I recognized my best friend's voice.

"She didn't have anything, Lily; I'm _so_ sorry! I was _sure_ – " I could tell when she had noticed the boys standing over me, because her voice suddenly cut off and then turned deadly. "What the hell do you think you're doing, Potter?" I blearily turned my head to look at her. Her wand was out, pointed directly at James' face, her expression dangerous. His hands immediately left my shoulder. He opened his mouth to speak, but she cut him off and turned her wand on Sirius. "And you! I wouldn't have thought that even you would stand around and let your friend take advantage of her being too sick to move - !"

"Ev!" I said as loudly as I could, which, as it turns out, wasn't that loud at all. "Ev!" She turned to look at me, sparks still flying in her eyes, her want still aimed directly for Sirius' heart. Sirius looked like he wanted to cower to but was holding himself in place out of sheer will. "He wasn't doing anything. They're all being very considerate and kind." She raised an eyebrow, questioning my sanity. "My shoulder was killing me."

"Oh," she said, lowering her wand. "My apologies, then." She nodded to Sirius, who returned the gesture, and James' hands resumed their soothing motions. I sighed with relief, hunkering more deeply into the pillows. Evangeline came and kneeled in front of me, reaching up to stroke my hair.

"I'm really sorry, Lil," she said apologetically. "Madame Pomfrey said she couldn't do anything; she reckons it's best just to wait it out like last time." I nodded tiredly, my eyes falling closed, my body relaxing as much as possible in its current state due to James and Evangeline's ministrations.

"Do you want some dinner?" she asked softly. I shook my head swiftly, feeling my stomach churn.

"Wouldn't stay down," I muttered. A few minutes later I fell asleep.

When I awoke, it was dark, and I knew from past experiences that the raging pain in my stomach meant it was nearly midnight. By the dim glow the dying embers cast around the room, I could see Evangeline curled into an armchair not too far away from me. I considered closing my eyes, trying to drift back off to sleep, when suddenly some idiot tried to lift me.

"I swear that if you move me, once I am physically able I will hex you into the next century," I gasped, my hands tightly gripping the edges of the sofa as the pain shot through me.

"C'mon, Evans," Sirius said in a soothing, kind voice. It was a caring tone, odd but not at all unsuited to him. "I'm going to put you up in our dormitory. You can't sleep out here on the bloody sofa."

"Sirius, please," I begged. "_Please_." His hands hesitated under my shoulders and my knees.

"Are you sure?" he asked, unsure.

"Yes," I said emphatically. Then I groaned and he eyed me skeptically. "I'm fine," I assured him shakily. "It'll be over in a few hours, anyway." I groaned and convulsed again. His hands did release me then. I looked up to see that he had crossed them in front of his chest and was looking down at me with a slightly angry expression.

"What do you mean it'll be over in a few hours?" he asked. "Evans, what did you _do_?" He stared at me and I stared back. Evangeline muttered something in her sleep, and we both looked over to her.

"Do me a favor," I muttered, my hands gripping the edge of the cushion again, fighting against a grimace. "Put her up in the dorm, please." His look sufficiently got the message of _don't-think-I'm-finished-with-you-yet_ across, but he walked over to carefully lift her into his arms. She immediately curled up into his chest, causing him to smile slightly. I smiled at the two of them, then cringed as a hiss ripped from my teeth. Sirius looked over at me worriedly, and quickly walked up the staircase to his dormitory. A few moments later he was back by my side.

"All right, Evans," he muttered, crouching down by my head. "You've got yourself some explaining to do."

I grimaced, not entirely from the pain. "Must I?"

He nodded emphatically. "Yes." I pouted.

"Whatever happened to being kind to the sickly?" He snorted.

"You know, I'm not entirely convinced that you didn't curse yourself or something to turn so sickly in such a short period of time." It was evident he had been teasing, because when I said nothing, his eyes grew wide, and he grabbed my wrist to listen to my pulse. "Bloody hell, Lily! What did you _do_?!" I pulled my hand tiredly out of his grasp.

"It's fine, Sirius. It's happened before."

"You mean you've hexed yourself before to scare your friends needlessly?"

My eyes dropped at the insinuation. "It was to distract Evangeline."

He snorted, glaring. "From what?"

"Her plans."

"Her plans."

"She wanted to go swimming tonight," I said by way of explanation. He blinked at me. "…In the lake." His eyes widened almost comically, only they held an edge of fear and defensiveness that was too disorienting in Sirius to be comical.

"You know." His voice was a nearly silent whisper. I nodded.

"She's rather persistent," I continued in my explanation. "There's really only one way to put her off her plans once she's set her mind on something."

He rolled his eyes. "Faking your death?"

"Sort of," I began, but my stomach twinged violently, and I bit my hand to keep from screaming.

As I lay there gasping, Sirius whispered in a strangled voice, "Please, _please_ tell me that you didn't try to off yourself, Lily."

"'Course not," I muttered. "Just had to do something drastic enough that Madame Pomfrey couldn't reverse it or cure it and Evangeline was sufficiently distracted." As my body shuddered and involuntarily turned in on itself again, Sirius looked on with a horrified expression. When I stopped shaking, I felt his hand hesitantly stroke my back.

"Lily," he whispered. "What did you _do_?" His eyes dropped to the arm wrapped tightly around my stomach. "Oh Merlin, Evans, you didn't….What did you…What the hell did you do to your stomach?!"

"It's going to be fine in a few hours," I moaned. "I'll be good as new. It'll be over around five o'clock." Just then, the cloud cover broke and a sliver of bright, white moonlight fell through a crack in the curtains. Sirius cursed, jumping up to his feet, then looked down at me concernedly.

"You have to go," I whispered. "Remus is going to need your help." He nodded, patted my head awkwardly one last time, and turned away, then turned back, looking torn. "_Go_, Sirius," I groaned, slightly exasperated. "I've gotten through it just fine before. Besides, the worst is almost over, anyway." He nodded again, and strode towards the portrait hole.

He turned back to me before exiting. "I swear, Evans," he muttered, shaking his head. "If you die, I'll kill you…" Leaving me trying to snicker and fight the pain in my stomach, he slipped through the hole, the portrait swinging shut behind him.

I awoke a third time, exhausted beyond compare; sore, but no longer in pain. I lay there for a minute, thankful it was over, when I remembered what had awoken me.

"You really scared me that time," Evangeline said quietly, running her fingers through my hair. She looked as exhausted as I felt, sitting next to me on the sofa, her tousled purple hair glinting in the sunlight filtering into the nearly empty common room.

"Sorry," I croaked, not feeling sorry at all for detaining her from her trip to the grounds.

"S'okay," she yawned. "Are you alright?" I nodded. "I think we should go up and grab a few winks if we can. I'm completely knackered; I woke up in the boys' dorm for some odd reason."

"You go up," I said, stretching and ignoring her remark about waking up in the boys' dormitory. "I'm going to change, but then I think I'm going to go see if Madame Pomfrey can give me anything…I'm so sore it's not even funny."

"Alright," she said, knowing better than to argue with me. She helped me up, and we trundled up the staircase and into our dorm. She immediately fell asleep on her bed, while I quickly showered and threw on some denims and a clean jumper before slipping back down the staircase and out the portrait hole. I walked stiffly through the corridors; the castle was still mostly asleep…I doubted it was later than seven o'clock.

When I reached the hospital wing, I knocked softly on the door. It was opened quickly by the round, caring face of Madame Pomfrey.

"Oh, Miss Evans!" she cried, opening the door wider. "How are you, dear?" She immediately pulled me into the room and began checking my vitals.

"I'm fine, Madame Pomfrey. I think it was just like last time."

She clucked her tongue concernedly, still listening to my pulse. "When Miss Jeannette came running in here last night, I wasn't so sure you'd make it through as easily…" I laughed tiredly.

"I really am fine, Madame Pomfrey." I caught sight of the bed over her shoulder. Remus was lying down; the other three stood around him defensively. All four were eyeing me apprehensively, but Sirius also looked somewhat angry. "Actually, I heard Potter and Lupin were in here, and I was hoping I could talk to them about arranging a prefect's meeting today…?"

"Of course, dear," she nodded. "Normally I wouldn't agree, but Mr. Lupin seems healthy enough, and I know you won't upset him…you know, I never noticed before…it seems nearly every time Miss Jeannette comes in here to tell me that you're in trouble, Mr. Lupin is in here the next day…."

I felt three pairs of eyes narrow simultaneously at her words. I smiled weakly. "Must be some kind of bug going around the Tower."

"Yes, yes of course, dear. I'll just nip up to see Professor Dumbledore, then." She bustled off towards the entrance of the hospital wing and shut the door behind her with a quiet snap.

I turned to look at the four boys who were staring at me with mixed expressions. I passed over Peter quickly, avoided eye contact with James and Sirius, and finally settled my gaze on Remus. He was looking more pale and drawn than I had ever seen him, but he was also looking exceptionally anxious. He gazed back at me, before swallowing.

"You look better," he said quietly, still staring nervously.

I shrugged. "Yeah, it's pretty much always a twenty-four-hour kind of thing."  
"You would know," Sirius muttered from his corner. I glared at him, swaying a little as I stood. Remus patted the bed.

"Come sit," he said. "You look like you're about to pass out." I immediately complied, sinking back against the headboard with relief. "How are you?" I looked up to see him looking down at me with concern.

"Fine," I shrugged. "Just tired." He nodded, his eyes closing slightly, looking haggard. "How are you?" I asked softly, deciding to take my chances. "You look like you had a rough night." His eyes shot open. Whoops. Looking around, I saw that Peter looked amazed; Sirius' mouth was white because his lips were pressed together so tightly, and James' eyes were narrowed again. Double whoops.

"Listen, Lily," he said slowly, "I don't know what you've heard, but I have no clue – "

"What I've heard?" I snorted. "I'm flattered, Remus." His eyebrows shot up.

"Erm, okay? I don't understand what you're trying to say, but – " He stopped talking, defeated, as I raised an eyebrow. It was silent a moment longer. "Lily, it's…" he sighed. "I'm still _me_. It's not something I want, not something I can control. I…" He sighed again, and after a moment, asked, "How long have you known?"

I shrugged. "Since second year." Apparently I was trying to shock him into a heart attack that morning, because his eyes bulged out of their sockets and he started choking. The other boys were looking just as shocked, standing around uselessly as I slapped Remus on the back. When he finally regained control of his airways, he just stared at me.

"What?!" I asked defensively. His eyes, if possible, widened further.

"'What?!' You've known that I'm a werewolf since second year, and all you can say is 'What?!' as though _I'm_ the one completely out of my mind?"

"Oh, it gets better, Moony," Sirius glared at me, cutting off my response. "Last night when her friend threatened to sneak out to the lake for a swim, she made herself sick to prevent her from going rather than acting logically and telling her friend that, unfortunately, no, they can't go parading around the grounds tonight because there's an uncontrollable werewolf on the rampage."

"You did that to yourself?" James asked in a dangerously quiet voice, looking at me harshly. I'm only slightly ashamed to admit that I quailed under his hard look.

"I was fine; I had everything under control – "

"You fucking made your stomach digest itself until it almost killed you!" Sirius exploded, waving his arms at me angrily. A sudden silence followed his words. Stupid git, jumping to conclusions like that. I glared darkly at him as I felt James' head swivel from Sirius to me, his eyes on fire.

"Please," he growled, putting one hand on his hip and burying his face in the other. "Please tell me that you were not that stupid and wouldn't do something that extreme, and that Sirius is being a bloody prat."

"I was not that stupid and would never do something that extreme, and Sirius is _always_ a bloody prat," I spat, throwing another glare at Sirius for good measure. James looked up and his scowl deepened.

"I want the truth, Lily!"

"Make up your mind then, because that's not what you asked me to tell you!" I snapped, turning to look at him. His expression got stormier.

"Why," he growled. If I hadn't been so angry, I might have been seriously scared. "Why the bloody _fucking_ hell would you be stupid enough to – "

"Oh, don't you even try to give me that," I spat. "Don't you dare try to tell me that I should have just spilled Remus' 'furry little problem' to Evangeline, even if I knew she wouldn't have told anyone." Sirius' mouth had almost quirked up into a smirk as I quoted back his explanation for Remus' monthly disappearances from fifth year, but it quickly morphed back into a scowl as I continued. "You just don't _do_ that."

Remus laughed suddenly. We all turned to stare at him. "Quite the clever little witch, aren't you?" he chortled. He turned to look at his friends. "Here we were worried about her finding out this year because of her being Head Girl." He chuckled again. "And she figured it out before you guys did!" I crossed my arms, smug.

"Well, obviously." Peter and Sirius snickered slightly in response to Remus' enthusiasm, but James was still angry. Good. I hope he got a headache.

Remus slung an arm around my shoulders, hugging me lightly. "You know, Lily, I'm rather happy at the moment. You've known all this time."

"Naturally."

"What I mean is, I rather worry about what people would do if they found out, especially people I care about. That's why I didn't tell any of these prats – " he nodded his head towards his friends, "until third year, when they practically forced it out of me. And if you've known all this time, well, that means that in fourth year when you declared me your official and undisputed favorite Marauder, you already knew, which means you know my deepest, darkest secret and accept me anyway."

"…That sounds about right." He laughed again and ruffled my hair.

"Lily, Lily, Lily…" he sighed happily, then looked over at me. "It doesn't freak you out, honestly?"

I shrugged. "You're still _Remus_." He laughed again, shaking his head, and removed his arms from my shoulders.

"Well," I said, figuratively "hopping up"…my stomach was still too sensitive for drastic movement. "I'm off, then. Just wanted to make sure you lot were all right. But, seeing as you are, I think I'm going to go see if Evangeline is awake yet, then maybe nip a bite for breakfast…" My voice trailed off as I noticed the murderous expression on James' face.

"How's your stomach?" he asked, angry but obviously still concerned.

"Fine," I said meekly. He gave me a look. "Honestly! It is!" I stamped my foot when he continued to glare. "Uugh! You'd think it had never happened before the way you lot were carrying on!" His glare heightened. "Do _not_ look at me like that. I was perfectly in control."

"Tch," Sirius muttered darkly. I huffed.

"It was merely a rather enthusiastic Tickling Charm combined with a, um, a slightly…intense Burning Hex?" My voice trailed off pathetically at the end, turning my emphatic and unaffected declaration into a timid question as my Gryffindor courage promptly abandoned me at the look on James' face.

"A slightly intense burning hex," he repeated slowly, his expression stormy.

"Well, yeah, it's gonna sound masochistic and completely mental when you say it like that," I replied, my eyes narrowed. "But have _you_ ever tried getting Evangeline to change her mind when she's decided on something?" It was silent. It appeared that they all had, in fact. "So I'm sorry if I'd rather my best friend not run into a werewolf gallivanting around the grounds at night, unarmed and completely unprepared." I paused and squeezed Remus' hand. "No offense, Remus."

"None taken," he smiled grimly back.

I turned back to James. "So, um, can I go now?"

"Please," he sighed. "Please, please, _please_ promise me you will never do that again."

I wrinkled my nose. "How about I promise I'll never do it again without telling you first?" I qualified. He sighed.

"I suppose that knowing you it's the best I'm going to get," he muttered. I winced my agreement. "Just…just don't do it all the time, okay? Only for absolutely, completely, utterly unavoidable emergencies."

I rolled my eyes, pulling away and walking to the door. "Sweet Merlin, Potter," I smirked over my shoulder at the four of them. "Just how daft do you think I am?"

*****

_So, I know this is rather atrocious writing and an absolutely rubbish plot so far...but this is one of those stories that I had to write because otherwise it just floats around in my head and refuses to leave, taking up precious space that could be otherwise devoted to more important (or at least more critical) things. Like the math final that I've got coming up next week. Erg. _

_Thanks for bearing with me. :)_


End file.
